Cougar Woman Admits Younger Men Are Exhausting

 By Linda Franklin

I read an article about relationships that have a large age gap and wanted to share it with you. To get the full scoop click here.  With all the spin around Ashton and Demi’s divorce, many women are wondering if an older woman can find happiness with a younger man.    You decide for yourself.

Cougar Woman Admit Younger Men Exhausting by Linda Franklin The Real Cougar WomanHelen Backhouse, 56, an artist, is married to computer programmer Pierre Burghgraeve, 40. Helen thinks the 17 years between her and husband Pierre have become more apparent as they have got older. She says, “I enjoy reading, gardening and sitting peacefully, while Pierre is much more active. And our tastes are very different, too. I love music from the Seventies that he hates, and he listens to rap, which I can’t stand”.

“I like to tell everyone he keeps me young, but it can be exhausting being with a younger man”. And living with him and my son is sometimes like living with two squabbling teenage boys”.

There’s no doubt that being with a younger man raises eyebrows.

When we first got together, my friends were horrified. They worried he would eventually fall in love with a woman his own age and I would get hurt. Pierre reassures me this will never happen. Yet there are times when I have questioned what on earth I am doing.

I married my first husband, when I was 26 — he was the same age. The marriage ended after ten years without us having children.

When I was 38, I decided I wanted to be a mother and a  male friend agreed to be the donor father. I brought Thomas up on my own, until I met Pierre.

We met when Pierre when he became the chef at a restaurant near my home in 2004. When it comes to the physical side of our relationship, the thing that flashes through my mind is, ‘I’d better have the lights off’ — but Pierre has always made me feel desirable.

Sometimes I do worry about the fact that when he’s 65, I’ll be in my 80s. But I joke that after I’ve gone, he can find a woman his own age and have a whole new life.’

PIERRE SAYS: To me, age is irrelevant. When I met Helen, I didn’t think: ‘How old is she?’ I simply thought what an attractive, interesting woman she was. She has a wonderful career and is her own woman. I like the fact she’s seen more of life than me.

People may look at us oddly sometimes, but I no longer notice. Besides, I am not frozen in time — I am ageing, too. As I get older, I feel the age gap between us narrows. I don’t think too much about the future — I am just glad we are happy now.’

The Real Cougar Woman is a 5-carat diamond who knows the importance of taking care of her health, beauty, relationships, finances and spirituality. Linda Franklin says,”there is no stopping a woman who has a strong belief system, passion and a dream. All things are possible”. Linda’s book, Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am helps women of all ages tap into their power and live life to the fullest.

Cougars – The Last Taboo

Cougar couple 3 Older women who prefer younger men seems to remain taboo in a world where precious few remain.

The Graduate, kept young male movie-goers titillated for years. Byron did the same in Don Juan, as did   Stendhal in Scarlet and Black, and Bernard Schlink in The Reader. The dynamic has always inspired the artistic imagination, but no written account goes into as much depth as Stephen Vizinczey's era-transcending, In Praise of Older Women, re-released this week as a Penguin Classic.

The best-selling book, which was originally published in 1965 and has sold more than five million copies worldwide, must have provoked a veritable glut of misalliances after its narrator, Andras Vajda, described in enchanting detail his discovery that the embraces of older women are infinitely preferable to those of younger girls.

Forty-five years after penning those lines, the Hungarian-born Vizinczey, now 76, remains ardent on the subject. "To be a young man and have a grown woman as your lover is not just sexy, it is paradise," he says. "That's what my novel is about. Women start at 30 and just get better."  

"The sex appeal of a woman has very little to do with the kind of things magazines talk about. It doesn't have much to do with big breasts, small breasts, – the most important part of sex appeal is humanity, an affectionate nature, intelligence. Allure certainly has very little to do with clothes. Isn't a woman best dressed when she is naked?"

Germaine Greer. the author of The Female Eunuch maintains, "older men sit in judgment, but boys don't do that. They are able to admire a woman for what she has achieved."

So are these older women liberated or damaged? Women in the public eye, Vizinczey shrugs, "are financially independent and therefore can defy convention, but women who cannot afford to defy convention have to do it in secret or be labelled predators".

The only way to banish this last taboo is to be proud of who you are – be proud of your relationship – stop listening to what other people say and just enjoy the love you have today.