Marriage – Is It The Best Choice?

It's hard to imagine in this environment of infidelity, sex addiicton and coping with a recession why anyone would choose to get married.  All the hopes and dreams we believed about happily ever after seem to be nothing but a fairy tale illusion.  It's very possible, the "hard work" it takes to make a marriage work simply wrings out all the passion and joy two people once might have felt for each other. The spectacular public bust-ups we read about every day makes it very obvious we currently inhabit a vast and bleak landscape of marital discontent.Bride and groom

In a much-discussed survey of 35,000 American women, published last year in Women's Day, 72 percent of married women said they had considered leaving their husbands. Seventy-nine percent said they'd like sex more often, and 52 percent said they have no sex life whatsoever.

Most of us have not consciously or categorically banished passionate love from our lives, we just can't seem to make it work. 

Talk to almost any therapist, and he or she will tell you that the primary reason people aren't happy is they are too tired to have sex and have built up a mountain of resentments over the difficulty of running a household together.  This is in part why we are so fascinated with marriages that appear, from the outside at least, highly functional and romantic but are they really? 

It's interesting that even as heterosexual women are sounding the death knell for their nuptials, homosexual men and women are fighting for the right to marry traditionally. It may be that you can't properly loathe an institution of which you are not yet a member.


One thought on “Marriage – Is It The Best Choice?

  1. The idea of the institution of marriage really has four concepts built into it NEVER discussed. (1) Women are taught early in life to take care of others; most women are given dolls while men traditionally would never be given anything to take care of except a truck. Thus unconscious conditioning(cross culturally) ties a woman’s self esteem to needing to care for everyone else but herself UNTIL a divorce or she becomes a widow. (2) Marriage also exists to give children (adopted or natural) a family name so the family legacy can continue. (3) Society has structured marriage to have BENEFITS like tax breaks, the ability for couples supposedly to get rich faster based on two incomes ( you can also get poorer faster if BOTH do not manage the money). (4) For those who have a religious base,marriage is simply a religious rite of passage, therefore finding someone to support one’s religious beliefs is critical if the marriage is to last a long time. SEX has nothing to do with marriage other than pro creation and with the high number of sexual transmitted diseases (STD’s) it’s nice to know you won’t get sick if you maintain a monogamous relationship.
    Marriage is REALLY beautiful IF both women and men could learn to be both self sufficient and take care of each other equally. Marriage could REALLY be beautiful if both have positive self esteem. Abusive behavior needs to be STOP before marriage. Women need to step up and teach their sons EMPATHY along with men mentoring their sons on masculinity.
    Each so call addict of any addiction will pass that on to a NEW generation and the cycle continues. I don’t hate the idea of marriage at all I have accepted CINDERALLA has died and her story should be band in our society. She was an abused woman rescued by a PRINCE and they lived happy ever after.
    The problem is REALITY and learning how to live with another person and their faults gives NO future promises. I seek a Companion NOT marriage because I have my own money and do not want mix my own financial success into a commitment any more.

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