Cougar Relationships – Are they Just About Sex and Money?

by Dr. Fayr Barkley Ph.D.

 

So many of the women I talk to tell me they had unfulfilled sex lives when they were married. Child rearing, career, taking care of the home and hubby left them totally exhausted. Marrying young, without the experience of varied sexual partners, and not having fulfilling married sex, all contributed to them wanting more. 

 

They want what they feel they have missed out on, and many are finding this experience with a younger man.

 

It’s important to note, however, that 90% of these women are looking for a relationship, as opposed to a one night stand or a friend with benefits.

 

I don’t know?  Is the media to blame for how we view older women, younger men relationships?  Many of the younger men I talk to tell me they are not happy in how the media portrays them; horny, bumbling frat boys trying to lose their virginity. I know doctors, lawyers, engineers, MBAs and other professionals  who are seriously looking for a meaningful relationship with an older woman. 

Unfortunately, there are still men, whom I say are laboring under the Myth of Stiffler’s Mom, who think a Cougar is a desperate, leopard print wearing, wine guzzling, bar fly waiting to drag them home, provide endless sex and pay their bills. The fact is, there are far more younger men looking to meet older women than there are older women looking to meet younger men.  So, The Real Cougar Woman can afford to be very selective. If the man doesn’t bring his A game to the table he will be passed over. 

Women over 40 make up over 50% of the work force. They are controlling more and more of the disposable income in the United States and with financial freedom come more choices. Since they don’t need a man to support them financially, they are going after what appeals to them more: younger men who are fun, adoring, exciting, who are eager to please in and out of bed.  They are ditching the couch potatoes in favor of the younger and more active men.

 

Some relationships are for a reason, some last but a season and some last a lifetime. I believe there is a lid for every pot.

 

The Real Cougar Woman is a 5-carat diamond who knows the importance of taking care of her health, beauty, relationships, finances and spirituality. Linda Franklin says,”there is no stopping a woman who has a strong belief system, passion and a dream. All things are possible”. Linda’s book, Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am helps women of all ages tap into their power and live life to the fullest.

Women’s Attraction To Other Women

by Linda Franklin

Ok, hold onto your hats ladies, apparently as we get older, we become naturally bi-curious when it comes to sex.  I have to admit I never heard of the term bi-curious, but have always thought if all the taboos would disappear we are all bi-sexual by nature.  Some women I have talked to agree with that, others are not so sure. 

A study carried out by Boise State University found that out of a group of 484 heterosexual women, 60 per cent were sexually attracted to other women; 45 per cent had kissed a woman and 50 per cent had fantasies about the same sex.  

Elizabeth Morgan, a professor of psychology at the Idaho-based university, whose studies are focused on same-sex attractions among heterosexuals, said her findings revealed that straight women often feel more than a friendly affection for other women.

Other data suggests upwards of 20 per cent of women are attracted to other women. It’s claimed this could be linked to the natural affection women show towards one another when they socialize, from chatting on the phone for hours to snuggling during chick flicks.

It is said often that women’s friendships are barely distinguishable from romantic relationships. ‘Women are encouraged to be emotionally close to each other,’ said Prof. Morgan.

‘That provides an opportunity for intimacy and romantic feelings to develop.’ 

Contributing to the findings, Lisa Diamond, Ph.D. a psychologist at the University of Utah, followed a group of women attracted to other women over a 15 year period.   

Her data shows for the first time how sexuality develops over a lifetime. At each of the half dozen follow-up interviews, she asked each woman to label herself as lesbian, bisexual, heterosexual or unlabelled and share details about her love life.

The findings startled even her. Over time, each woman’s chosen labels changed repeatedly, with one noteworthy trend.

Ms Diamond said the older they got, the more likely they were to choose ‘unlabelled’ which meant the older they got, the more they felt their sexuality didn’t fit into tidy boxes.

She said: ‘We have this idea that sexuality gets clearer and more defined as time goes on. ‘We consider that a sign of maturity to figure out who you are. I’ve seen it’s really the opposite.’

The Real Cougar Woman is a 5-carat diamond who knows the importance of taking care of her health, beauty, relationships, finances and spirituality. Linda Franklin says,”there is no stopping a woman who has a strong belief system, passion and a dream. All things are possible”. Linda’s book, Don’t Ever Call Me Ma’am helps women of all ages tap into their power and live life to the fullest.